Paris Hilton Mocks John McCain

The McCain camp decided to use Paris Hilton, Britney Spears, and others to do a bit of a back handed mockery on Obama recently in a campaign ad. The ad was designed to show that Obama was nothing more than a celebrity and that he has no experience. Yeah...the tired campaign BS of Hillary in force with McCain.

Anyways, after seeing the ads from the tv deals McCain had, Paris decided to fight back and mock him as well. HEre is her campaign video in which she probably at least looks liky a better candidate than "that wrinkly white-haired guy".

See more funny videos at Funny or Die

Britney Spears's Baby Battle Ends

I guess celeb news has taken a hit this weekend. Britney's custody battle is over. A custody settlement between Britney Spears and Kevin Federline has been finalized, including a $5,000-per-month child-support increase for the pop singer's ex-husband.

Federline, can get his moving boxes together and get into better diggs now I guess. Attorneys delivered the terms of the agreement to a Los Angeles Superior Court office Friday afternoon. According to the documents, Spears' payments to Federline go from $15,000 to $20,000 per month, retroactive to July 15.

Gotta pay for those hookers, booze, and recreational drugs after all.

Dark Knight New Box Office Champ

Batman Dark Knight opened Friday among some of the most hype in recent memory for any movie. That hype paid off as the movie was able to overtake Spiderman 3 as the highest grossing opening weekend film in box office history.

"The Dark Knight" took in a record $155.34 million in its first weekend, said Dan Fellman, head of distribution for Warner Bros., which released the "Batman Begins" sequel.

That topped Hollywood's previous best of $151.1 million, set by "Spider-Man 3" in May 2007.

"We knew it would be big, but we never expected to dominate the marketplace like we did," Fellman said. The movie should shoot past the $200 million mark by the end of the week, he said.

Factoring in higher admission prices, however, "Spider-Man 3" may have sold slightly more tickets than "The Dark Knight."

At 2007's average price of $6.88, "Spider-Man 3" sold 21.96 million tickets over opening weekend. Box office tracker Media By Numbers estimates today's average movie prices at $7.08, which means "The Dark Knight" would have sold 21.94 million tickets.

Money means everything though, so it will still get the title of highest opening weekend, although it probably sold less tickets than Spiderman 3 did. I spent the weekend in my sexy swimwear rather than going to the movies so sorry, Dark Knight, I didn't do my part.

Dark Knight to Break Opening Weekend Box Office Record?

I really have no doubt it will. I honestly have not heard more hype around a summer movie in the last 5 years as this one is getting. People just want to see it, and the reviews are spectacular. Add in the Heath Ledger side of it, and combine that with a great movie, this very well could be the biggest weekend opener of all-time.

Already, advance ticket sales have resulted in the sell-out of nearly 1,000 showtimes, online ticket seller Fandango said.

It seems that the super hero franchise movies are the biggest of the bunch. "Dark Knight" will hope to beat the record debut of Sony Pictures Entertainment's "Spider-Man 3" in 2007, which reached $151 million. Sony Pictures is part of Japanese electronics company Sony Corp.

In the No. 2 spot is the $135.6 million debut for 2006's "Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest," released by the film division of The Walt Disney Co. Who cares about #2 though right? ;)

Heath Ledger's "Joker" Named Top 25 Film Villain

One of the most anticipated movies of the summer, and frankly one of the most anticipated movies in a long time I can think of is the new Batman movie, Dark Knight. While we are all still waiting for the theaters to throw off the slipcovers and let us see the movie, accolades are coming in from all over about the performance of the Joker by deceased actor, Heath Ledger.

In fact, Moviefone.com has named Ledger's performance as on the of the Best 25 Villain's of All-Time in a recent list. The list includes notable villains like Hanibal Lecter, Agent Smith of The Matrix, and Annie Wilkes of Misery.

Michael Jackson Seen in Wheelchair in Vegas

Michael Jackson has been so many things over my lifetime that I don't even know what to say about him anymore. When I was a little kid he was a musical genius. Even now I still enjoy a lot of his music. He always had strange image problems. Then this pedophile crap. Now he is out and about in a wheelchair with a dust mask over his face apparently being pushed a round a bookstore looking at some of the best selling . Amazon books.

The New York Daily News, who spoke to the photographer that snapped the pics of the King of Pop being pushed around Las Vegas, reports that the photos were taken on Monday as Jackson was being wheeled around a bookstore. "His skin was peeling and . . . he looks so thin and gaunt," said Mike Lopez, who snapped the photos of Jackson.

I really don't even know what tho say anymore. I sort of feel sad for him now more than anything. I never really believed the whole pedophile thing, but who knows.

Madonna and Britney Gonna Get Freaky

As if MAdonna isn't getting ugly as sin, she has to pull along Britney into her web of freakiness on stage with her in some upcoming shows.

Madonna and Britney have filmed a video for Madonna's upcoming tour that a British tabloid describes as "bondage mummy" and "X-rated." It goes on to describe the near-nude erotic number that follows.

An on-set source describes the montage as "absolutely classic Madonna," calling it "the raunchiest stuff she has ever done. It leaves nothing to the imagination and will be very controversial." More crap that perverts can put on their ipods for some "alone" time.

Free Bon Jovi Tickets! Only $1500 each!

So...Bon Jovi is supposedly holding a free concert in Central Park this Saturday. That was until people that are typically looking for jobs in Atlanta decided that they would go out and see if they could scalp the freebies their relatives in New York had gotten.

These "free" tickets are popping up on Ebay and have asking prices from 99 cents up to $1500 each. Only in America, baby.

Ebay has been contacted by the city of New York and has tried to get these auctions removed.

Usher - Love In This Club (Performed by Showbiz Pizza Band)

Some guy went out and bought the Showbiz Pizza band Raco-afire and decided it would be funny to tape them singing popular songs. Then he went and put these videos on the internet. Now you are going to watch them, and you are going to laugh. The genius of these videos is incredible. Better put on some reagular clothes adn put away your lingerie because these will make you want to touch yourself. Save yourself the temptation of doing so. I encourage you to watch the rest of the videos by the same band.

Judge halts release of Mini-Me sex tape

The greatest sex tape of all-time has been taken away from us. Vern Troyer, the Mini-Me guy from Austin Powers made a sex tape, but a judge says we can't see it. Who would want to I guess, but you know there are some freaks out there. Not me of course, but other people.

TMZ posted a 25-second snipped of the video Wednesday, but pulled the clips down Friday evening after a federal judge granted a temporary restraining order requested by Troyer’s attorneys.

The ruling also prevents any attempt by a porn distributor from taking orders for the full 50-minute video, and keeps TMZ from broadcasting any more clips. Troyer’s lawsuit also seeks $20 million in damages and the return of all copies of the tape. Yeah...sure buddy...Oops...forgot that one that slipped under the cushion of my modern furniture couch there. Sorry....how did that get on the internet?